1/ A challenging story by Jeb Lund in Rolling Stone about police shootings of blacks.....they happen because white America wants them to happen.....
1/ Community members speak outside the Triple S Food Mart where Alton Sterling was shot and killed by police early Tuesday in Baton Rouge, Louisiana, July 6, 2016
You could begin yesterday by watching video of a black man in Louisiana killed by police as he lay on the ground. You could end it by watching another black man, this time shot by police in Minnesota, slowly bleed to death in a car as a seven-year-old girl looked on from the back seat, while the man's girlfriend prayed to God not to take him.
This is the way things are because we – the privileged, safe, and secure public – asked for it. The only difference now is that we can no longer turn a corner on the internet without seeing live footage of whatwe've chosen.
In Baton Rouge, police responded Tuesday to a 911 call about a black man with a gun threatening people outside a convenience store, and found 37-year-old Alton Sterling.
2/ A Hillary ad from SNL.....feeling the Bern.....very funny.....
While the show’s large cast boasts several bright lights, it’s hard to argue against Kate McKinnon as the show’s biggest star right now. She rarely fails to nail down the funniest aspects of an impression, character or sketch. Her well of invention on the show appears to be bottomless, and her upcoming starring role in Ghostbusters (along with castmates Leslie Jones and Cecily Strong) will almost certainly propel her into a film career in a huge way. Last but not least, she’s the one doing the always-funny impression of our most likely next president.
As such, it’s not surprising that she could pull off what she did here.
The ad parody begins simply and predictably, with “A Message from Hillary Clinton” on the screen, and McKinnon as Clinton talking to millennials over a soaring bed of music. The spot features her nakedly pandering to millennials in response to that group’s strong preference to Sanders over Clinton in the polls. She says, in voice-over as we she her meeting young people, that she shares their beliefs, noting as she does that there are, “so, so many of you.”
3/ An unusual story - the only black Republican US Senator opens up on his life experiences.....
The Senate's Only Black Republican Opens Up About Being Mistreated by Cops
Citing recent killings by police, Tim Scott of South Carolina asked his colleagues to stop ignoring the struggles of those who face racial prejudice.
Tim Scott of South Carolina is the only black Republican in the United States Senate. This week, moved by police killings of Eric Garner, Walter Scott, and Philando Castile, he rose to the floor to deliver a moving speech about his personal history being stopped by law-enforcement officers for what amounted to driving while black. “While I thank God that I have not endured bodily harm,” he declared, “I have felt the pressure applied by the scales of justice when they are slanted. I have felt the anger, the frustration, the sadness, and the humiliation that comes from feeling that you are being targeted for nothing more than being just yourself.”
4/ Rudy Giuliani long ago became irrelevant, so to try to get back on TV he says the vilest and dumbest things.....and of course Fox News laps it up.....
Here Seth Meyers eviscerates Mr. 9/11, with facts and jokes.....a good 8 minutes....
“Late Night” host Seth Meyers on Monday took a “Closer Look” at politicians’ individual responses to three high-profile police-involved shootings last week.
“Vitriol and inflammatory rhetoric only make it more difficult to have the kind of constructive dialogue we need right now,” Meyers said. “While many offered calm, sober responses, others used the occasion to unfairly blame peaceful protesters or political opponents.”
Meyers cited former-New York Mayor Rudy Giuliani’s recent criticisms of the “inherently racist” Black Lives Matter movement. Giuliani argued on Fox News that if he “had an organization called White Lives Matter, you would say it was a racist organization.”
5/ It's rare to see an excellent essay about politics these days, so enjoy this one from George Saunders in the New Yorker about Trump supporters.....it's fluid writing, almost lyrical and he tries to capture the feelings of Trumpeters and what is happening to America.
I wish I could write like this......
Trump is wearing the red baseball cap, or not. From this distance, he is strangely handsome, well proportioned, puts you in mind of a sea captain: Alan Hale from “Gilligan’s Island,” say, had Hale been slimmer, richer, more self-confident. We are afforded a side view of a head of silver-yellow hair and a hawklike orange-red face, the cheeks of which, if stared at steadily enough, will seem, through some optical illusion, to glow orange-redder at moments when the crowd is especially pleased. If you’ve ever, watching “The Apprentice,” entertained fantasies of how you might fare in the boardroom (the Donald, recognizing your excellent qualities with his professional businessman’s acumen, does not fire you but, on the contrary, pulls you aside to assign you some important non-TV, real-world mission), you may, for a brief, embarrassing instant, as he scans the crowd, expect him to recognize you.
He is blessing us here in San Jose, California, with his celebrity, promising never to disappoint us, letting us in on the latest bit of inside-baseball campaign strategy:
6/ Even though he is off for a month, John Oliver is media savvy enough to send out a clip every week....this one is about his Youtube channel.....a reasonably good four minutes.....
While HBO’s Last Week Tonight may not have aired a new episode on Sunday, the show has been diligent about releasing web-exclusive clips during their off-weeks, presumably just to give us here at Mediaite something to write about first thing Monday morning. And last night’s web segment didn’t disappoint, as host John Olivertackled a barrage of “Fan Mail,” though as he clarified at the beginning of the segment, “As always our fan mail comes in the form of YouTube comments: the most cogent, written argument for never learning how to read.”
With such a strong digital presence — the Last Week Tonight channel on YouTube boasts 3.6 million subscribers — Oliver had lots of commentary to choose from. Everything ranging from, “John Oliver looks like a mix of a Pokemon and a child molester,” to the more appreciative “John Oliver has nice eyebrows,” was included in this week’s Fan Mail.
7/ An insightful article from Benjamin Studebaker on Brexit, British politics and the new Prime Minister Theresa May.....if you are at all interested in the UK, a good read.....
Is Theresa May Britain’s Mitt Romney?
by Benjamin Studebaker
With the abrupt departure of Andrea Leadsom from the Conservative Party leadership contest, Theresa May has cruised into number 10 as Britain’s new PM. To many, it appears that the Tory establishment has reasserted control over the Conservative Party. But I’m not convinced this is true–when Mitt Romney won the 2012 Republican primary, many people assumed that this meant the Republican establishment was in firm control, but within just four years Donald Trump had run Romney and the rest of the establishment Republicans off the Tarpeian Rock. Indeed, a close look at the data reveals that just as the 2012 result concealed deep weaknesses within the Republican establishment, the Tory establishment remains extremely vulnerable. May owes her victory to the incompetence and disorganization of her rivals, and she will need to be extraordinarily careful to preserve it.
Back in January, I discussed what happened in the 2012 Republican primary. For most of the race, the rebel candidates consistently commanded far more support than the establishment, but the establishment was able to win anyway:
8/ A really good one from Bill Maher....he's on form.....five minutes.....
Friday hilariously imagined the kind of things that Donald Trump would say if he ever participated in Us Weekly’s regular feature “25 Things You Don’t Know About Me.”
The “Real Time With Bill Maher” host followed up on previous segments, in which he riffed on the likely responses of Bernie Sanders and Ted Cruz, to poke fun at the presumptive GOP presidential candidate.
In the interest of “equal time” ― after presumptive Democratic nominee Hillary Clinton actually was featured in the magazine ― the comedian unleashed a series of scathing one-liners on The Donald, including a zinger about birther Trump not actually believing Barack Obama was born in Kenya “because I thought the name of the country was Kanye.”
9/ Paul Krugman with a good column.....how "enabler" Republicans are falling in line behind Trump.....
A couple of weeks ago Paul Ryan, the speaker of the House, sort of laid out both a health care plan and a tax plan. I say sort of, because there weren’t enough details in either case to do any kind of quantitative analysis. But it was clear that Mr. Ryan’s latest proposals had the same general shape as every other proposal he’s released: huge tax cuts for the wealthy combined with savage but smaller cuts in aid to the poor, and the claim that all of this would somehow reduce the budget deficit thanks to unspecified additional measures.
Given everything else that’s going on, this latest installment of Ryanomics attracted little attention. One group that did notice, however, was Fix the Debt, a nonpartisan deficit-scold group that used to have substantial influence in Washington.
Indeed, Fix the Debt issued a statement — but not, as you might have expected, condemning Mr. Ryan for proposing to make the deficit bigger. No, the statement praised him. “We are concerned that the policies in the plan may not add up,” the organization admitted, but it went on to declare that “we welcome this blueprint.”
And there, in miniature, is the story of how America ended up with someone like Donald Trump as the presumptive Republican nominee and possible next president. It’s all about the enablers, and the enablers of the enablers.
10/ A great story from the Times on how badly we treat prisoners, when jobs like transporting inmates are outsourced to private companies......
In July 2012, Steven Galack, the former owner of a home remodeling business, was living in Florida when he was arrested on an out-of-state warrant for failing to pay child support. Mr. Galack, 46, had come to the end of a long downward spiral, overcoming a painkiller addiction only to struggle with crippling anxiety. Now, he was to be driven more than a thousand miles to Butler County, Ohio, where his ex-wife and three children lived, to face a judge.
Like dozens of states and countless localities, Butler County outsources the long-distance transport of suspects and fugitives. Mr. Galack was loaded into a van run by Prisoner Transportation Services of America, the nation’s largest for-profit extradition company.
Crammed around him were 10 other people, both men and women, all handcuffed and shackled at the waist and ankles. They sat tightly packed on seats inside a cage, with no way to lie down to sleep. The air conditioning faltered amid 90-degree heat. Mr. Galack soon grew delusional, keeping everyone awake with a barrage of chatter and odd behavior. On the third day, the van stopped in Georgia, and one of two guards onboard gave a directive to the prisoners. “Only body shots,” one prisoner said she heard the guard say. The others began to stomp on Mr. Galack, two prisoners said.
11/ Guy video - a super bike being chased by the cops.....four minutes of testosterone......
12/ Some sex offenders deserve everything they get, but there are some who shouldn't to be on the sex offender registry at all.....like 16 year olds sleeping with 15 year olds, or someone convicted of taking a pee outside.....
Good story from Vox......
When I first became a public defender, I believed the worst punishment that my clients would face would be time in jail. Since then, I've learned that incarceration is not the only — and perhaps not the worst — punishment the criminal justice system can impose. The registration requirements imposed on those convicted of sex offenses are unfairly harsh and punitive, though few recognize them as such.
I had always assumed that sex offender registration was limited to those who committed the most egregious and dangerous offenses. I had also trusted that the Supreme Court was right when, in 2003, it stated that sex offender registration laws are not punishments but merely administrative requirements to protect public safety.
But I realize now that many of my clients would choose to take on more jail time, more fees — anything to avoid being labeled a sex offender for life. That's because our current sex offender registration laws apply an unbending and inhumane one-size-fits-all approach that does not prevent future sex crimes and in fact makes us all less safe.
13/ A clever little video on the many different British accents....about 90 seconds....
14/ How to extend your Smartphone's battery life...
Ashlei Temeña’s family trip to Disneyland last Thanksgiving break turned into a nightmare when her smartphone battery hit empty.
Ms. Temeña, a San Francisco support technician, had gotten separated from her family and realized she had no way to find anyone. Instead of riding roller coasters, she wandered around searching for the group — eventually locating them four hours later watching fireworks.
“I wanted to throw my phone on the ground by the end of the day,” Ms. Temeña said.
Many consumers can relate. Despite the leaps forward in mobile phone technology with crisp, clear screens and faster chips, batteries have made only sluggish progress. That has propelled a desire for longer battery life to the top of the list of factors considered by consumers when they purchase smartphones, according to a 2014 survey by the research firm IDC.
15/ Stephen Colbert has a running schtick about the primaries, comparing the candidates to contestants in the Hunger Games.....here he says goodbye to Bernie.....five amusing minutes.....
And then there were two.
With Bernie Sanders officially endorsing Hillary Clinton Tuesday, only she and Donald Trump remain in the race for the presidency and, more importantly, The Late Show's Hungry for Power Games, where Stephen Colbert bid farewell to the Vermont senator. "Bernie Sanders has fallen, and like many seniors, he can not get up," Colbert said.
The host then reminisced about the dozens of candidates who were at the starting line when the presidential race began in 2015. "Oh, so few remain. But the bar is closing and America has to go home with someone," the blue-wigged Colbert said. "Sadly, today, we lost the bravest tribute of all. A man we actually lost months ago but who courageously kept pretending not to be dead. Today, Bernie Sanders endorsed Hillary Clinton."
Colbert then looked back at the Sanders campaign, from his barely attended announcement that he was running for president to his arena-packing rallies. "Somehow, Bernie became popular with his platform of giving everyone everything that they want, and he excited young voters with his pure sex appeal," Colbert added. "He had bedroom eyes and bedroom head. And soon, tribute Sanders was filling entire stadiums. He was like the Rolling Stones, only younger."
16/ An excellent column from Carl Hiaasen in the Miami Herald on the algae blooms, and our slimy Governor's slithering to avoid responsibility.....
They say a picture tells a thousand words.
If it’s a picture of an algae-covered beach, it can also cancel thousands of hotel reservations.
That’s the new dread in Florida, as photos and news videos of gunk-covered shorelines are making headlines all over the world. Why would anyone bring their families to vacation on Playa Guacamole?
And do they even make haz-mat suits in children’s sizes?
The likely cause of the algae outbreak that has slimed beaches on both Florida coastlines is fouled fresh water from Lake Okeechobee, which the U.S. Army Corps of Engineers began discharging after heavy rains in January. Nitrogen and phosphates from massive agricultural dumping into the lake fuel algal blooms, which worsen in the summer heat.
This latest outbreak is spectacularly ugly, toxic to health and devastating to local marine and tourist-based businesses. Hardest hit is Martin County, on the Treasure Coast, where scummy Lake O water has poured into the saltwater estuary from the St. Lucie River.
Gov. Rick Scott has reacted with unwavering impotence, declaring one state of emergency after another while blaming the federal government for failing to upgrade the dike surrounding the lake so that more dirty water can be retained.
Cleaning up that dirty water is not a priority for this Republican governor or this Republican-led Legislature. In exchange for a deluge of campaign donations, they have worked steadfastly to gut pollution regulations and put the biggest polluters in control of state water policy.
Todays short horror video - "Mama", from Guillermo del Toro......the first minute is an interview with Del Toro.....scary....
Todays Norwegian joke
A beautiful, curvy, woman, stark naked, jumped into a taxi in Minot, North Dakota. The taxi driver, good old Ole, an Old Norwegian man, opened his eyes wide and stared at the woman. He made no attempt to start the cab.
She said to him: "What's wrong with you honey? Haven't you ever seen a naked woman before?"
Ole said "Lady, I'm not staring at you, I am telling you, dat vould not be proper vair I come from".
She said:- "Well, if you're not staring at my boob's sweetie, what are you doing then?"
Ole looked at her and said: "Vell, I am lookin and I'm lookin, and I am tinking to me-self’s, vair in da hell is dis lady keeping da money to pay for dis ride?
She said to him: "What's wrong with you honey? Haven't you ever seen a naked woman before?"
Ole said "Lady, I'm not staring at you, I am telling you, dat vould not be proper vair I come from".
She said:- "Well, if you're not staring at my boob's sweetie, what are you doing then?"
Ole looked at her and said: "Vell, I am lookin and I'm lookin, and I am tinking to me-self’s, vair in da hell is dis lady keeping da money to pay for dis ride?
Todays retiree story
This is not a joke, just something that happened at Village at Riverwalk, an over 55 retirement community. The people who live there have small homes but often eat at the clubhouse where pancake breakfasts are served.
One morning one of the residents didn't show up for breakfast so my wife went and knocked on his door to see if everything was OK. She could hear him through the door and he said that he was running late and would be there shortly so she went back to the clubhouse dining area.
An hour later he still hadn't arrived so she went back to his house and she found him on the stairs to his lanai. He was coming down the stairs but was having a hell of time. He had a death grip on the hand rail and seemed to have trouble getting his legs to work right. She told him she was going to call an ambulance but he told her no, he wasn't in any pain and just wanted to have his breakfast.
So she helped him the rest of the way down the stairs and he had his breakfast. When he tried to return to his home he was completely unable to get up even the first step so she called an ambulance for him.
A couple hours later she called the hospital to see how he was doing. The receptionist there said he was fine, he just had both of his legs in one leg of his boxer shorts.
Todays intellectual jokes
These may have you scratch your head a little but once you figure the joke, you are sure to react as if you just saw the gold coin on your table even though it had been lying there the whole time.
1. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
To.
To who?
No, to whom.
Image source2. What did the DNA say to the other DNA?
“Do these genes make me look fat?”
Image source3. A Roman walks into a bar and asks for a martinus.
“You mean a martini?” the bartender asks.
The Roman replies, “If I wanted a double, I would have asked for it!”
Image source
Another Roman walks into the bar, holds up two fingers, and says, “Five beers, please.”
4. A philosopher says to a linguist “What if, instead of periods, women had apostrophes?”
The linguist replied, “They’d be more possessive and have more frequent contractions.”
Image source5. It’s hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs because they always take things literally!
Image source6. A Buddhist monk approaches a burger food-truck and says “make me one with everything.”
The Buddhist monk pays with a $20 bill, which the vendor takes, puts in his cash box, and closes the lid.
“Where’s my change?” the monk asks.
The vendor replies, “change comes from within.”
Image source7. How can you tell the difference between a chemist and a plumber?
Ask them to pronounce “unionized.”
Image source
A plumber would say- ‘you-niun-ized’ ,whereas a chemist would say- ‘un-ayon-ized’. Gettit? Gettit??
8. Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says “We don’t serve noble gases in here.”
Helium doesn’t react.
Image source9. Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says “I think I’ll have an H2O.”
The second one says “I think I’ll have an H2O too”
Image source
— and he died.
10. What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?
“HeHe”
Image source11. A linguistics professor says during a lecture that, “In English, a double negative forms a positive. But in some languages, such as Russian, a double negative is still a negative. However, in no language in the world can a double positive form a negative.”
But then a voice from the back of the room piped up, “Yeah, right.”
Image source12. A hyperbole is an exaggerated claim. No, really, realllllllllllyyyyy exaggerated. I mean, like, the most exaggerated thing in the history of ever!!
Image source13. As I said before, I never repeat myself.
Image source14. I would make another chemistry joke but all good ones ARGON!
Image source15. The statement below is true. The statement above is false :/
Image source16. I wish there was a knob on the TV to turn up the intelligence. There’s a knob called brightness, but it doesn’t work!
Image source17. The Higgs Boson walks into a church.
The priest says “we don’t allow Higgs Bosons in here”
The Higgs Boson says “but without me how can you have mass?”
Image source18. I heard that Oxygen and Magnesium got together and I was like..
..”OMg”
Image source19. There’s a band called 1023MB. They haven’t had any gigs yet though
Image source
How many of these seemingly twisted jokes could you figure without straining your head?
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