Tuesday, March 29, 2016

Davids Daily Dose - Tuesday March 29th



Just had a week's vacation in Charleston, and although the VRBO ad said wifi, they lied......so we're a bit behind.....anyway enjoy.....



The President brought in hundreds of Cubans on Air Force One.....thanks Obama.....

This picture from The Onion made it to Snopes because people were believing it......



CLAIM: As President Obama departed Cuba, dozens of prospective refugees clung to the wings of Air Force One.
FALSE





1/  Wow - Thomas Frank with an excerpt from his new book "Listen Liberal" [which I just bought], which brings a new perspective to the legacy of Bill Clinton and it isn't what your memory tells you. You remember vaguely he was a pretty good middle of the road President who should have told us all his personal life was none of our f##king business. 

Think again.....his legacy was much worse. 

A thought provoking story from Thomas Frank.....

Bill Clinton's odious presidency: Thomas Frank on the real history of the '90sDemocratic presidential nominee Bill Clinton gives the thumbs up sign as he speaks to a gathering at the University of Toledo in 1992.(Credit: AP)
Everyone remembers the years of the Bill Clinton presidency as good times. The economy was booming, the stock market was ascending, and the mood was infectious. You felt good about it even if you didn’t own a single share.
And yet: What did Clinton actually do in his eight years on Pennsylvania Avenue? While writing this book, I would periodically ask my liberal friends if they could recall the progressive laws he got passed, the high-minded policies he fought for—you know, the good things Bill Clinton got done while he was president. Why was it, I wondered, that we were supposed to think so highly of him—apart from his obvious personal charm, I mean?
It proved difficult for my libs. People mentioned the obvious things: Clinton once raised the minimum wage and expanded the Earned Income Tax Credit. He balanced the budget. He secured a modest tax increase on the rich. And he did propose a national health program, although it didn’t get very far and was in fact so poorly designed it could be a model of how not to do big policy initiatives.
Other than that, not much. No one could think of any great but hopeless Clintonian stands on principle; after all, this is the guy who once took a poll to decide where to go on vacation. His presidency was all about campaign donations, not personal bravery—he basically rented out the Lincoln Bedroom, for chrissake, and at the end of his time in office he even appeared to sell a presidential pardon.













2/  A pretty good Bill Maher on the Republican race.....six minutes......

"Donald Trump is like ebola, Ted Cruz is like Zika": Bill Maher breaks down the GOP's horrifying choices
“Real Time” host Bill Maher last night discussed the lose-lose decision Republicans have to make between Ted Cruz and Donald Trump.
“You guys started out with 17 candidates,” Maher told GOP voters. “And somehow you ended up with Mussolini and Joe McCarthy.”
“Donald Trump is like Ebola, he’ll violently kill you right away,” Maher continued. “Cruz is more like the Zika virus, we wont see the damage until future generations.”











3/  Excellent article from the respected journalist Bill Moyers on two of the most prominent pseudoDemocrats, and why they should go......

Left: Rahm Emanuel (Photo by Scott Olson/Getty Images). Right: Debbie Wasserman Schultz (Photo by Stephen Lovekin/Getty Images for OurTime.org).

There are two Democrats whose resignation from office right now would do their party and country a service.
Their disappearance might also help Hillary Clinton convince skeptical Democrats that her nomination, if it happens, is about the future, and not about resurrecting and ratifying the worst aspects of the first Clinton reign when she and her husband rarely met a donor to whom they wouldn’t try to auction a sleepover in the Lincoln Bedroom.
In fact, while we’re at it, and if Secretary Clinton really wants us to believe she’s no creature of the corporate and Wall Street money machine — despite more than $44 million in contributions from the financial industry since 2000 and her $675,000 in speaking fees from Goldman Sachs, not to mention several million more paid by other business interests for an hour or two of her time — she should pick up the gauntlet herself and publicly call for the departure of these two, although they are among her nearest and dearest. And we don’t mean Bill and Chelsea.












4/  Frank Rich with one of his long articles on the Republican "establishment"......a well researched and fascinating story by the ultimate insider.....

In mid-July of 2015, a month after Donald Trump announced his presidential run, I joined a gaggle of political junkies in a clubby bar four blocks from the White House to hear a legendary campaign strategist expound on the race ahead. Our guest’s long résumé included service to Mitt Romney and two generations of Bushes. Not speaking for attribution, and not having signed on to any 2016 campaign, he could talk freely. The nomination was Jeb Bush’s to lose, he said. Scott Walker, the union-busting Wisconsin governor then considered something of a favorite, had no chance because he was just “too stupid.” And Trump? Please! Trump represented every ugly element that was dragging down the GOP in presidential elections. But our guy wasn’t fazed. The good thing about Trump, he said, is that he would finally “gather together all the people we want to lose” and march them off the Republican reservation — though to what location remained undisclosed.
That same week, I was at a similar gathering with John McCain, then in a mild fury that Trump had just appeared with the nativist Arizona sheriff Joe Arpaio at a weekend rally in Phoenix. McCain worried that by activating “the crazies” — the same crazies, it politely went unmentioned, that he helped legitimize by putting Sarah Palin on his ticket in 2008 — Trump could jeopardize both the GOP in general and McCain’s own incumbency if challenged in a primary. The senator soon said the same in public, and not long after that, Trump retaliated by mocking his wartime bravery with the memorable insult “I like people who weren’t captured.”
And that, you may recall, was the end of Trump.













5/  An amusing [and frankly a little scary] video from Samantha Bee, where she assembles a focus group of young Trump supporters.....seven minutes.....

Samantha Bee's Donald Trump focus group (Screen capture)
Samantha Bee's Donald Trump focus group (Screen capture)

As Donald Trump's rise in American politics continues, many bewildered Americans have posed the same question: Just who are the people supporting this guy?
Full Frontal host Samantha Bee tried to find out. In a segment aired on Monday, she talked to a diverse group of Trump supporters to understand why they support him.
Much of the support seemed to be based on Trump's style. One person said that "what makes Mr. Trump great" is that he makes jokes. Another said, "He's got very sort of simplistic but evocative language that I think speaks to a lot of people at almost like a limbic or primal level."
But the supporters did not appreciate when Bee took Trump's comments at face value. Time and time again, they argued that media coverage of Trump is unfair.













6/  Matt Taibbi in Rolling Stone on Hillary, and how the millennials are right about her.....

Hillary Clinton; Rolling Stone EndorsementJann Wenner endorsed Hillary Clinton in a 'Rolling Stone' editorial this week. Patrick T. Fallon/Bloomberg/Getty Images
I was disappointed to hear that Rolling Stone had endorsed Hillary Clinton, but I also understood. In many ways, the endorsement by my boss and editor, Jann Wenner, read like the result of painful soul-searching, after this very magazine had a profound influence on a similar race, back in 1972.
Jann explains this eloquently in "Hillary Clinton for President":
"Rolling Stone has championed the 'youth vote' since 1972, when 18-year-olds were first given the right to vote. The Vietnam War was a fact of daily life then, and Sen. George McGovern, the liberal anti-war activist from South Dakota, became the first vessel of young Americans, and Hunter S. Thompson wrote our first presidential-campaign coverage. We worked furiously for McGovern. We failed; Nixon was re-elected in a landslide."
The failure of George McGovern had a major impact on a generation of Democrats, who believed they'd faced a painful reality about the limits of idealism in American politics. Jann sums it up: "Those of us there learned a very clear lesson: America chooses its presidents from the middle, not from the ideological wings."
But it would be a shame if we disqualified every honest politician, or forever disavowed the judgment of young people, just because George McGovern lost an election four decades ago.
http://www.rollingstone.com/politics/news/why-young-people-are-right-about-hillary-clinton-20160325?page=3











7/  A Finnish News Team report on the US elections.....with subtitles. Two hilarious minutes from "Funny Or Die"..........

“FINLAND’S CHANNEL 8 NEWS TEAM: THE ONLY SOURCE YOU NEED FOR THE U.S. ELECTION WITH THE LATEST ANALYSIS OF THE GOP AND DEMOCRATIC CONTENDERS FROM A EUROPEAN PERSPECTIVE.”










8/  One of orange man's huge strengths is how viciously he attacks his opponent's weaknesses.......great story from Andrew O'Hehir in Salon.....

Trumped again: The diabolical GOP frontrunner slimes Cruz, shames Fox & controls the news cycleDonald Trump  (Credit: AP/Greg Allen)
When is a news story not a news story? That question hung in the air much of the day on Friday, as the major cable news networks laboriously steered around any direct reference to the political bombshell that had set social media aflame since the small hours. Once again the mainstream media had been Trumped, made to look floundering and foolish by the Republican clown-prince even as it wrestled with one of the biggest news days of the year. Belgian authorities had apparently captured a leading suspect in the Brussels attacks, and the United States military had apparently killed an ISIS leader in Syria. But for at least half the day, those headlines felt like footnotes to the hot topic TV news wouldn’t even touch.
With no apparent sense of irony, Fox News sought to recast itself as a sober, responsible news organization, whose guests and commentators are deeply concerned about the toxic nature of American political discourse. During the 11 a.m. hour of Fox’s “Happening Now,” an entire group of panelists earnestly embraced Hillary Clinton’s recent complaint that moderate, centrist, reasonable voices had been excluded from public debate and political media, and that this was harming democracy. 












9/  SNL did a "Walken Family Reunion" skit, and if you like Christopher Walken you will find this amusing....five minutes of Walkens.....

Oftentimes, “SNL” will bring back super popular hosts and guest stars and make fun of them in one long skit that they have to participate in. That was certainly the case for Christopher Walken, who has been hosting since the 1980s and has played myriad characters over the years.
For the “Walken Family Reunion,” Christopher got to reunite with some of his favorite “family members” at a bar. There were some cousins and a niece and nephew played by Amy Poehler and Andy Samberg. Jason Sudeikis got in on the action, along with Fred Armisen, who plays a very flamboyant relative.
Darrell Hammond, Kristen Wiig and even Kenan Thompson all had roles to play. All the while, they were all using classic Walken speech, with its famous elongated pauses and awkward speaking patterns. The episode originally aired in April of 2008, but it’s still funny to this day.














10/  Simon and Garfunkle's "Sound Of Silence" like you have never heard it before......one of the most powerful and moving music videos you will ever see.....

And if you watched it a few weeks ago, look at it again - it's even better the second time......

If you choose to remake a song, you will undoubtedly face comparison to the original. Such is exceedingly the case when you remake a legendary song from the soundtrack of the 1960s counterculture movement. Disturbed does just that with the Simon & Garfunkle hit, The Sound of Silence, and does it brilliantly.
The original acoustic version of The Sound of Silence (Wednesday Morning, 3 AM – Simon & Garfunkle 1964) made its appearance during the rise of folk rock. The gentle harmonies and acoustic guitar easily captured the attention of a nation during a time of growing social tension. The song’s deep emotion draws in the listener taking them on a journey of deep contemplation.
The Disturbed remake offers everything the original did and more. The remake is haunting, slower, and darker. Disturbed vocalist David Draiman, typically known for his raspy, power metal voice, sings beautifully; his voice is crisp and clear.
The Sound of Silence closes with a crescendo of instrument and voice. The listener stirred by the somber anthem is left hanging on wistful yearning.
The visual canvas of the music video matches the feel of the song. Dark, grayscale images of a bleak landscape are punctuated by closeups of Draiman’s face as he sings. The imagery is surreal suggesting a return of music to a forlorn society. While it may seem over the top to some, it is a fitting backdrop for this moving hymn.










11/  One of the issues of our politics is low voter turnout, especially the younger demographics, but as this article says with some interesting charts and graphs it's not all the fault of the young...democracy doesn't work in their favor at all, quite the opposite....

Very interesting and insightful....
This has been true for a long time–Millennials did not invent low youth voter turnout:
Many people see figures like this and their knee-jerk response is to scold young people for failing to show up, often attributing it to the laziness or lack of civic virtue of the current crop of young people. But as we see above, young people have been less active in politics since long before Millennials came on the scene. There are larger reasons why young people tend to feel disenfranchised by democratic politics–it’s because the system discriminates against them.













12/  Seth Meyers on a subject you may need a refresher on - Kansas and it's tax cutting Governor..... a very good six minutes indeed....

Last week, New York’s Eric Levitz argued that more attention should be paid to the disastrous budget implemented under Kansas governor Sam Brownback, since all three contenders for the GOP nomination favor similar policies on a national scale. And Monday night, Seth Meyers dedicated a segment to Kansas and its relevance to the presidential race, comparing the situation to a cleaning product that suggests testing on a small patch of fabric first. “Kansas was the small patch of fabric,” said Meyers, “and not only did the cleaner not work, the couch exploded.”
You can watch Meyers’s segment below. Come for the smart talk about Kansas’s budget woes; stay for the jokes about the state’s auction of sex toys seized from a tax-delinquent porn shop.
                                                                                               https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xliMwipXoiA











13/  Perky Pam Bondi, Florida's Attorney General, endorsed Trump last week, and do you know why? The reason is, as usual with Floriduh politicians, corruption......

Yes - the ranking law officer in Florida is as corrupt as the rest of them.....

CREDIT: SCREENSHOT
Florida Attorney General Pam Bondi endorses Donald Trump during a rally in Tampa.

Bondi’s Monday endorsement comes more than two years after she decided not to follow the New York attorney general’s lead and sue Trump over accusations Trump University seminars swindled people. The timeline of that fall 2013 episode raised eyebrows. Three days after a Bondi spokeswoman said the attorney general was studying New York’s lawsuit to see whether she wanted to take similar action in Florida, Trump cut a $25,000 check to a committee associated with Bondi’s campaign. That seeming conflict of interest was criticized in the Florida press at the time, but a Bondi spokesperson justified her decision by suggesting no action was necessary because the affected Florida consumers would be compensated if New York won that case.
With Trump now closing in on the Republican presidential nomination, Trump University is under heightened scrutiny.













14/  Samantha Bee with a very funny look at the awfulness of Ted Cruz......six excellent minutes.....

Samantha Bee Tears Trump, Cruz Apart — "Even God" Doesn't Want to Deal With Cruz
Source: YouTube
Even in the guise of comedy, though, Bee highlighted the unsettling rhetoric of Cruz's supporters, which includes his father, the Rev. Rafael Cruz, and their mission to dissolve the separation of church and state. Rafael Cruz also cites his son as the candidate that's inherently the choice of God, saying that divine messages have been sent to the senator through the likes of his wife, Heidi Cruz. 













15/  Here's a blog that says voters in Florida are revolting.....against the discharge of pollutants into the oceans from Lake cesspool......thanks Big Sugar and it's purchased politicians.....

Of course, most Florida voters aren't upset about this, they are asleep as usual.....


Republican voters are rebelling at having their taxes used against them by insiders and their property used as Big Sugar's sacrifice zones. They know Florida's political leaders are shielding Big Sugar by refusing to complete the one action voters already ordered into the Florida Constitution: buy billions of dollars of agricultural land now in private ownership in order to stop the state's waterways from being turned into toxic waste sites.

Donald Trump did not recognize the broad based civic revolt against pollution in Florida today. Nor, for that matter have Democrats grasped how the issue is connecting Republican and Democratic voters on both the east and west coasts of the state. 

What is clear is that voters wanted a divorce from Marco Rubio. His too facile, too slick, and too evasive talking points on issues of deep voter concern -- including Big Sugar -- didn't stick. On the failure of state party leaders to protect people, property, and public health, Rubio was held to account by primary voters.

Take the southwest coast of Florida, for example, where Republican voters have traditionally followed the course set by very wealthy development and agricultural interests -- like the family of former Secretary of State Katharine Harris. Another top Bush supporter from Southwest Florida, Al Hoffman, provides an even clearer example how GOP self-dealing runs straight through the varsity business associations like the Florida Council of 100 that Hoffman once chaired, to the junior varsity, local county Chambers of Commerce and business councils. The ordinary GOP voter does not know Al Hoffman's name, or the deep traps that siphon campaign contributions to establishment candidates, but they know the outcomes.











16/  One more on the same subject, and I included it because I respect the writers controlled anger......

If you child is running a fever, there’s no mystery what to do. You make the child rest and take every necessary step to bring the child’s fever down. Entrusting Florida’s waters to reckless and ignorant elected officials is exactly the same as parental malpractice. It is like locking a child in a car parked at a mall parking lot while the parent goes shopping.
There is only one excuse for forgetting to take care of our waterways: that the campaign funders and politicians voters elected want it that way. 
The mainstream media are filled with talking points like this: “State wild officials could not pinpoint the reason for the deaths of the fish recently.” Bullshit. The massive, horrendous, shocking and sad fish kills happening in and around the Indian River Lagoon represent the political corruption infecting the state of Florida. 










Todays video - found this nine minute compilation of Clint Eastwood shootouts......a couple of new ones too.....










Todays thoughtful jokes....


My goal for 2015 was to lose just 10 pounds.  Only 15 to go.
......... 
 
Ate salad for dinner!  Mostly croutons & tomatoes.  Really just one big, round crouton covered with tomato sauce.  And cheese.   FINE, it was a pizza.  I ate a pizza.
........... 
 
How to prepare Tofu:
1.  Throw it in the trash.
2.  Grill some Meat.
...........
 
I just did a week's worth of cardio after walking into a spider web. 
..............
 
I don't mean to brag but......I finished my 14-day diet in 3 hours and 20 minutes.
..................
 
A recent study has found that women who carry a little extra weight live longer than men who mention it.
...................
 
Kids today don't know how easy they have it.  When I was young, I had to walk 9 feet through shag carpet to change the TV channel.
.................
 
Senility has been a smooth transition for me.
................
 
Remember back when we were kids and every time it was below zero out they closed school?
Me neither.
...............
 
I may not be that funny or athletic or good looking or smart or talented....
I forgot where I was going with this.
...................
 
I love being over 50.   I learn something new every day.......and forget 5 others.
...............
 
A thief broke into my house last night......
He started searching for money so I woke up and searched with him.
...............
 
My dentist told me I need a crown.  I was like:  I KNOW !, Right?
...............
 
I think I'll just put an "Out of Order" sticker on my forehead and call it a day.
................
 
 
PS:  Sunday, March 13, 2016 began Daylight Savings Time.  
Did you forget to set your bathroom scale back 10 pounds on Saturday night.







Todays marital joke

Travis wakes up with a huge hangover after attending his company's Christmas Party. He didn't even remember how he got home from the party. As  bad as he was feeling, he wondered if he did something wrong. 

Travis had to force himself to  open his eyes, and the first thing he saw is a  couple of aspirins next to a glass of water on the side table. And, next to them, a single red rose! Travis sits up and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed.

He looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotlessly clean. So is the rest of the house. He takes the aspirins, cringes when he sees a huge black eye staring back at him in the bathroom mirror. Then he notices a note hanging on the corner of the mirror written in red with little hearts on it and a kiss mark from his wife in lipstick: "Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to get groceries to make you your favorite dinner tonight. I love you, darling! Love, Jillian.

He stumbles to the kitchen and sure enough, there is hot breakfast, steaming hot coffee and the morning newspaper. His son is also at the table, eating. Travis asks, "Son...what happened last night?"

"Well, you came home after 3AM, drunk and out of your mind. You fell over the coffee table and broke it, and then you puked in the hallway, and got that black eye when you ran into the door.

"Confused, he asked his son, "So, why is everything in such perfect order and so clean? I have a rose, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me????

His son replies, "oh THAT!...Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your pants off, you screamed,"Leave me alone bitch, I'm married!"


Broken Coffee Table $239.99
Hot Breakfast $4.20
Two Aspirins $.38
Saying the right thing, at exactly the right time.....PRICELESS!







Todays single lady joke
Ethel checked into a Motel on her 65th Birthday; she was lonely and a little depressed at her advancing age so she decided to risk an adventure.  

She thought, "I'll call one of those men you see advertised in phone books for escorts and sensual massages."

She looked through the phone book, found a full page ad for a guy calling himself Tender Tony, a very handsome man with assorted physical skills flexing in the photo. He had all the right muscles in all the right places, thick wavy hair, long powerful legs, dazzling smile, six pack abs and she felt quite certain she could bounce a  dime off his well-oiled buns .......

She figured, what the heck, nobody will ever know. I'll give him a call.  "Good evening, ma'am, how may I help you?

Oh my, he sounded sooo sexy! 

Afraid of losing her nerve if she hesitated, she rushed right in, "I hear you give a great massage. I'd like you to come to my motel room and give me one. No, wait, l'll be straight with you. I'm in town all alone and what I really want is sex. I want it hot, and I want it now. Bring implements, toys, everything you've got in your bag of tricks.  We'll go at it all night - tie me up, cover me in chocolate syrup and whipped cream, anything and everything, I'm ready! Now how does that sound?
  
He said, "That sounds absolutely fantastic, but you need to press 9 for an outside line.


Saturday, March 12, 2016

Davids Daily Dose - Saturday March 12th



1/  Watching the news of thousands of protesters forcing the cancellation of a Trump event in Chicago, hearing that Trump has created a "protester intelligence group" to root out demonstrators, hearing his rhetoric about how to treat anyone disrupting his events....it's really, really not funny any more. This is getting serious: he has woken rage in a very dangerous segment of our society and we don't know where this will end.....

Matt Taibbi writes in this excellent story about people who have endorsed Trump, and where this might be going. 

Just like the right wing crazies buy guns because Obama was coming for them, liberals might want to think about quietly stockpiling some weapons and ammo.....

Endorses; Donald Trump; Endorsements; GOP
Sarah Palin endorsed Trump in January.

Earlier this week, an African-American protester was sucker-punched by a 78-year-old man in a cowboy hat at a Trump rally in North Carolina. The video went viral, and reporters later tracked down John McGraw, the red-faced Trumpthusiast who'd thrown the punch. McGraw explained why he'd belted Rakeem Jones:
"Number one, we don't know if he's ISIS," McGraw said.
One has to commend the Inside Edition reporter doing the interview for not bursting out laughing, or dropping to the ground in shock, at this moment. McGraw went on:
"The next time we see him, we might have to kill him," he said. "We don't know who he is. He might be with a terrorist organization."
That same night, Trump told Anderson Cooper he wasn't backing down from his plan to bar all Muslims from entering the country. "I think Islam hates us," he said, adding, "It's very hard to separate because you don't know who is who. We have to be very vigilant."
These episodes are like a child's game of "telephone," only played with bone-ignorant adults. The game starts when Trump personifies "Islam" under one label, apparently not realizing that this represents an awesomely diverse collection of people who collectively represent about a quarter of the world's population.











2/  Had to put this column from Thomas Friedman in DDD just for the title - "Only Trump Can Trump Trump".....but the article is more than just a snappy headline - it's a very good analysis of the Trump phenomenon, and also discusses his next moves after he gets the nomination....

Most interesting.....


Donald Trump at a primary night press conference on Tuesday.
Donald Trump is a walking political science course. His meteoric rise is lesson No. 1 on leadership: Most voters do not listen through their ears. They listen through their stomachs. If a leader can connect with them on a gut level, their response is: “Don’t bother me with the details. I trust your instincts.” If a leader can’t connect on a gut level, he or she can’t show them enough particulars. They’ll just keep asking, “Can you show me the details one more time?”
Trump’s Republican rivals keep thinking that if they just point out a few more details about him, voters will drop The Donald and turn to one of them instead. But you can’t talk voters out of something that they haven’t been talked into.










3/  Very funny ad for Trump from SNL......"Racists For Donald"......one minute of hilarity.....

CapturevvThis week’s Saturday Night Live followed up its Trump-centered “campaign coverage” of the 2016 presidential race with another shot at Republican presidential frontrunner Donald Trump, this time in the form of a dead-on campaign ad parody. The spot rolls out looking like every other slice-of-America campaign spot, and even though it telegraphs the reveal, the gag pays off because the execution is so spot-on.














4/  Democrats should be worried - the same dynamic that fuels Trump is fueling Bernie Sanders - disgust with the elites and the screwing of the middle class, and Hillary represents the elites no matter how hard she tries to copy Bernies policies....

Stop laughing, Democrats! As the GOP goes down in flames, your post-Bernie civil war is almost hereDebbie Wasserman Schultz, Bernie Sanders, Hillary Clinton  (Credit: AP/Stephen B. Morton/Carlos Osorio/Gerald Herbert/Photo montage by Salon)
It was easy to laugh at that gruesome Republican debate on Thursday night. Easy and fun! At least for a while. We laughed in incredulity; we laughed in horror. We laughed because there is some statistical possibility that one of those four men on that stage in Detroit will end up becoming president of the United States, and because the only one of them who remotely resembles a decent and normal human being is a notorious union buster and foe of reproductive choice who opposes raising the minimum wage and used to work at Lehman Brothers, the most notorious failed bank of the 2008 collapse. We did not laugh at John Kasich. We sighed and we swooned, because he would be a pretty bad president but that’s no longer the relevant standard. Compared to those other guys, Kasich is Mother Teresa wrapped in puff pastry and drizzled with Oscar Wilde. He probably means well, after his own limited fashion, and he does not resemble the Lizard Man of Zanth (Trump), the birthday clown with piles of bodies in the basement (Cruz) or Little Marco, who will say anything and do anything in service of his brilliant plan to win the nomination by continually finishing third.










5/  We have a new DDD favorite comedian - Samantha Bee.....here she nails the Republicans and Trump.....an excellent seven minutes in two parts...

"The GOP's final death rattle came that night": Samantha Bee's amazing eulogy for the Trump-destroyed Republican PartySamantha Bee  (Credit: TBS)
“Full Frontal” host Samantha Bee on Monday night staged a vigil for the recently deceased GOP.
“The death throes started Thursday morning, when the Republican establishment suddenly woke up and realized Donald Trump was doing to their brand what his asshole son does to real elephants,” Bee led off.
Bee said Mitt Romney’s G-rated roast (“Mitt-tervention”) of Donald Trump in Utah last Thursday “served as a donation, in kind, to the Trump campaign.”
“With all due respect, sir,” she continued, “the last time you tried to stand between a charismatic guy and the White House, you got beat like a Muslim girl at a Trump rally.”
“The GOP’s final death rattle came that night” at the Republican debate or, as Bee called it, Republicans’ “regular fight club meeting.”











6/  And on the same theme Bill Maher had one of Adolf Hitler's speeches translated, and it sounds eerily like Trump! Two disturbing but very amusing minutes.....

"We're going to make Germany great again, that I can tell you": Bill Maher shows how Donald Trump and Hitler can sound eerily similar
“Real Time” host Bill Maher last night went to the trouble of having one of Hitler’s speeches “translated” to English in order to contextualize Donald Trump’s idiosyncratic, KKK-endorsed hate-speech.
Since Trump entered the race in August, it has been widely re-reported that he at one time kept a volume of Hitler’s speeches in a cabinet by his bed, which, according to his ex-wife Ivana, he would occasionally thumb through.











7/  It's a given that the media refers to Evangelicals as a "normal" group of Americans, but there's never any discussion of their beliefs....this is one of the first stories I've seen that calls them out and discusses their brand, and that's what it is - a very profitable brand.....

Evangelicals are hurting the GOP: The movement is now synonymous with bigotry and abject stupidity 

Republicans have long sought the vote of Christian fundamentalists. This election cycle they may prove a liability

Evangelicals are hurting the GOP: The movement is now synonymous with bigotry and abject stupidity(Credit: Reuters/Brendan McDermid/Vibe Images via Shutterstock/Photo montage by Salon)
This article originally appeared on AlterNet
AlterNetBack before 9/11 indelibly linked Islam with terrorism, back before the top association to “Catholic priest” was “pedophile,” most Americans—even nonreligious Americans—thought of religion as benign. I’m not religious myself, people would say, but what’s the harm if it gives someone else a little comfort or pleasure.
Back then, people associated Christianity with kindness and said things like, “That’s not very Christian of him,” when a person acted stingy or mean; and nobody except Evangelical Christians knew the difference between Evangelicalism and more open, inquiring forms of Christianity.
Those days are over. Islam will be forever tainted by Islamist brutalities, by images of bombings, beheadings, and burkas. The collar and cassock will forever evoke the image of bishops turning their backs while priests rub themselves on altar boys. And thanks to the fact that American Evangelical leaders sold their congregations to the Republican Party in exchange for political power, Evangelical Christianity is now distinctive—and widely despised.













8/  The comedy never ends - the Daily Show put an ad together for "Trump Dick".....one amusing minute.....

Today, the people over at The Daily Show dug up an old commercial for Trump Steaks, one of the many old business ventures of Trump’s that didn’t take off nearly as well as his bid for the presidency. Daily Show alum John Oliver even mentioned Trump Steaks in a recent roast of the mogul, so the topic has been getting some play this week.













9/  Not sure if you realize it yet, but the planet is screwed....and the real problems will be sooner than you think.....

A very good story by Bill McKibben, one of the climate change movements founders and leaders.... 

A view of the Kronebreen Glacier in northern Norway.
DOMINIQUE FAGET/AFP/GETTY IMAGES/FILE 2015
A view of the Kronebreen Glacier in northern Norway. 
By Bill McKibben   MARCH 05, 2016
Thursday, while the nation debated the relative size of Republican genitalia, something truly awful happened. Across the northern hemisphere, the temperature, if only for a few hours, apparently crossed a line: it was more than two degrees Celsius above “normal” for the first time in recorded history and likely for the first time in the course of human civilization. 
That’s important because the governments of the world have set two degrees Celsius as the must-not-cross red line that, theoretically, we’re doing all we can to avoid. And it’s important because most of the hemisphere has not really had a winter. They’ve been trucking snow into Anchorage for the start of the Iditarod; Arctic sea ice is at record low levels for the date; in New England doctors are already talking about the start of “allergy season.”










10/  Bill Maher with one of his best "New Rules".....there are at least five or six zingers you will LOL at.....five minutes of really edgy and amusing jokes......

Screen-Shot-2016-03-04-at-11.16.21-PMOne of the best parts of Real Time is when Bill Maherlays out his “new rule” for the evening.
Tonight, the New Rule was as follows:
You can’t spend the first half of a debate bitching about how immigrants are ruining the country and the second half on the uplifting stories of your immigrant parents.
He went on to point out how all of the candidates talk about their immigrant family members when they’re not talking about building walls.











11/  Maureen Dowd from the Times can be wickedly relevant when she's on form, as she is in this column......excellent.....

Donald Trump reacted after a mention of Marco Rubio during a rally last week during the Super Tuesday primaries.
WASHINGTON — HERE’S why the Trump campaign is wicked fun:
I watched Donald Trump in New York for decades, as a bachelor swanning, a party fixture mingling, a master of bling and bluster.
I went with him on his art-filled plane in 1999 as he dipped his toe in the presidential pool and saw him shyly approach his first political rope line, even as he bragged that other candidates didn’t draw as many cameras or have a supermodel by their side.
So I can assure you of two things. No one is more shocked at how far, how fast, Trump has come than Trump.
http://www.nytimes.com/2016/03/06/opinion/sunday/chickens-home-to-roost.html?smid=nytcore-ipad-share&smprod=nytcore-ipad&_r=0










12/  Every now and then we share a video of the truly insane at work - this one is of Danny MacAskill riding his bicycle on the rooftops of Gran Canarias, doing things that would give you and I a heart attack......over and over.....four amazing minutes.....

Danny MacAskill goes rooftopping on a bike in Grand Canaria, the second most populous island of Spain’s Canary Islands.












13/  Carl Hiaasen reams our oozing pus-filled wart of a Governor and how the slimy, corrupt asshole isn't dealing with the Lake Okeechobee crisis.....of course it's Obama's fault.....

As a devastating deluge of polluted water darkens two coasts of Florida and threatens their tourist economies, Gov. Rick Scott is once again a flaky phantom.
Billions of gallons spiked with agricultural waste is being pumped daily from Lake Okeechobee toward the Atlantic Ocean and Gulf of Mexico, browning the blue coastal waters, choking sea grass beds and crippling small businesses that depend on a healthy marine ecology.
The U.S. Army Corps of Engineers says the discharges are necessary because the water in Lake Okeechobee is too high and the old Hoover dike is too weak. Gov. Scott says it’s all President Obama’s fault for not rebuilding the dike, which is absurd.
Scott, who aspires to be a U.S. senator, either has no clue how the appropriations process works, or he’ll simply say any brainless thing to duck responsibility.
A brief civics lesson for our dim and furtive governor: The president cannot write a check for major capital projects. Congress is in charge of funding, and Congress happens to be controlled by the Republicans.
Being a Republican himself, Scott should fly straight to Washington and persuade his colleagues to rebuild the lake dike and fund a flow-way to the Everglades for the excess water.
Why hasn’t that happened? One reason is that Scott has even less clout with Congress than he does in Tallahassee.









 14/  I forced myself to watch Voldemort for three minutes of "Morning Joe" video.......

HOW DID THIS CARICATURE OF A HUMAN win two terms? Must be Floriduh.....

Scott dodged the question, opting instead for some mumbo jumbo about his constituents in Florida being a melting pot.
“I want you to answer the question!” Joe Scarborough pressed. “Do you personally think that Islam is a religion that hates America?”
As soon as the Governor began to respond again in terms of his homestate — clearly avoiding any semblance of an answer to what should be an easy question — Brzezinski can be heard telling the Morning Joe producers, “Wrap it.”
“No, no. That’s not answering any questions,” said Brzezinski sharply. She ended the interview immediately, and when Rick Scott attempted to speak again, it became clear his mic had been shut off.
Back from commercial, Brzezinski stated to the viewers, “That’s just not what we do on our show.” Watch the above awkward exchange from MSNBC’s Morning Joe.









15/  Our beautiful Florida coastline is in real trouble, but as the master George Carlin used to say "nobody seems to notice, nobody seems to care"....the government YOU elected....
Central Florida's Indian River Lagoon, North Florida's Apalachicola Bay and a trio of coastal estuaries in South Florida are in the throes of ecosystem collapses that threaten sea grass, fisheries, recreation and local economies.
What's to blame? A historic toll of chronic pollution and crippled drainage has been compounded by drought in recent years and El Niño downpours this winter.
The troubled environments are far apart, but their stories are similar and even intertwined.














16/  A treat - Netflix just released season 4 of "House Of Cards", but before you watch it read this synopsis from the Times of previous episodes.....

Kevin Spacey in “House of Cards.”
The third season of “House of Cards” ended practically in midsentence, with President Frank Underwood calling after his wife, Claire, as she walked out of the White House and, seemingly, away from their marriage and political partnership.
The fourth season, which went live on Netflix on Friday, picks up where that charged moment left off, while also continuing to follow Underwood as he campaigns for re-election.
Before settling into another binge-fest, here are a few talking points to keep in mind about some of the show’s key characters.
http://www.nytimes.com/2016/03/04/arts/television/house-of-cards-netflix-season-4-refresher.html?smid=nytcore-ipad-share&smprod=nytcore-ipad











Todays video - classic Bud Lite commercials

The sea shell......



Clothing drive.....






Todays old guy joke
Two old guys, one 84 and one 87, were sitting on their usual park bench. 
                   
11.jpg

 

The 87 year old had just finished his morning jog and wasn't even short of breath.
The 84 year old was amazed at his friend's stamina and asked him what he did to have so much energy. 
 
The 87 year old said, "Well, I eat rye bread every day. It keeps your energy level high and you'll have great stamina with the ladies." 
 
So, on the way home the 84 year old stops at the bakery. As he was looking around, the lady asked if he needed any help. 
 
He said "Do you have any Rye bread?" 
 
She said, "Yes, there's a whole shelf of it. Would you like some?" 
 
He said, "I want 5 loaves."
She said, "My goodness, 5 loaves ... By the time you get to the 3rd loaf, it'll be hard" 
 
He replied, "I can't believe it! Everybody knows about this shit but me."








Todays postman joke

After 35 years, mailman George decides to retire. On his last day, he makes his usual rounds.

When he arrives at the first house, the whole family comes out, congratulates him, and sends him on his way with a tidy gift envelope.

At the second house, they present him with a box of fine cigars. The folks at the third house hand him a selection of terrific fishing lures.

At the next house, he is met at the door by a strikingly beautiful woman in a revealing negligee. She takes him by the hand and leads him up to the bedroom, where she blows his mind with the most passionate sex he has ever experienced.

When done, they go downstairs, where she fixes him a giant breakfast. As she pours him a cup of coffee, he notices a dollar bill sticking out from under the cup's bottom edge.

"All this is just too wonderful for words," he says, "but what's the dollar for?"

"Well," she says, "last night, I told my husband that today would be your last day and that I wanted to do something special for you. I asked him what to give you. He said, 'Screw him. Give him a dollar.' But breakfast was my idea."










Todays guy golfer joke
This is one of the Alien Kidnappers who are kidnapping golfers.

Female aliens are invading the earth and kidnapping sexy, good looking men, who are great golfers.
You, personally, are not in any danger.
I just emailed you to say "Goodbye."