1/. Joe Biden is probably the most effective President we have had for decades - did you know he just took on the oil industry and denied them permits?
He is doing the job....he just can't run for the job, his 2024 campaign is to hide and point to Trump.
Listen to the podcast...#2....
Ten days ago Joe Biden did something remarkable, and almost without precedent – he actually said no to big oil.
His administration halted the granting of new permits for building liquefied natural gas (LNG) export terminals, something Washington had been handing out like M&Ms on Halloween for nearly a decade. It’s a provisional “no” – Department of Energy experts will spend the coming months figuring out a new formula for granting the licenses that takes the latest science and economics into account – but you can tell what a big deal it is because of the howls of rage coming from the petroleum industry and its gaggle of politicians.
2/. Democrats - I strongly encourage you to listen to this podcast in your house, car, doing yard work or wherever.....
It's Ezra Klein discussing Biden's campaign, and it's excellent....
3/. A clever little mini-movie with Jimmy Kimmel getting ideas for hosting the Oscars.....four mildly amusing but cleverly done minutes.....
4/. John Oliver is wonderful....a great story from the Guardian......unfortunately there's no
video as MAX won't release footage till Thursday....
The late-night talkshow host John Oliver has offered to pay Clarence Thomas $1m annually – as well as give him a $2m tour bus – if the Republican judge resigns from the US supreme court.
Oliver made the proposal on Sunday’s episode of his HBO show Last Week Tonight, saying the supreme court justice had 30 days to accept or it would expire.
5/. Tom Tomorrow with "Breaking News!"
6/. Joe Biden has a major problem with younger voters.......this story explains why....
In a January social-media post, MSNBC host Chris Hayes wondered, “Do the Biden campaign people understand the degree to which he is being *annihilated* on the social media platforms where young people get most to all of their news and information about the world?”
The premise was fair and the question reasonable. In popular videos on social-media platforms favored by young people, especially TikTok and Instagram, Joe Biden is frequently portrayed — by progressives, not MAGA acolytes — as a doddering old man, a corrupt Establishment tool, as a failure on environment issues and student-loan forgiveness, and as either complicit in or actively supporting war crimes or genocide. During the 2020 election, the Biden campaign was proudly aloof from much of social media, won anyway, and has since claimed vindication for its light-touch strategy of selective engagement, influencer partnerships, and cultivating “Facebook moms.” Maybe they really don’t know what’s going on out there, which doesn’t seem ideal, or maybe they just don’t care, which seems like a risk worth talking about.
7/. Don't show this to your MAGA uncle....
8/. Are you aware that Spain is running out of water? Thought not.....
W
alking through Barcelona these days, you can’t miss the signs and billboards picturing a red plastic bucket and the message “Water doesn’t fall from the sky” (l’aigua no cau del cel in Catalan). The ads are part of a campaign to get people to save water. Since the beginning of February, Barcelona and 200 other towns in Catalonia have been in an official drought emergency. That means more than 6 million people in the region live with restrictions. Daily water usage per inhabitant is limited. Parks are unwatered, fountains are dry and showers at swimming pools and beaches are closed. Farmers can’t irrigate most of their crops and must halve their water usage for livestock or face fines.
9/. Chris Hayes put together a montage of how MAGA went after the Bidens, on the word of a now discredited FBI informant.....
Will MAGA apologise? Sure....
10/. Threats of violence and death from MAGA are warping American life.....
Amid the constant drumbeat of sensational news stories — the scandals, the legal rulings, the wild political gambits — it’s sometimes easy to overlook the deeper trends that are shaping American life. For example, are you aware how much the constant threat of violence, principally from MAGA sources, is now warping American politics? If you wonder why so few people in red America seem to stand up directly against the MAGA movement, are you aware of the price they might pay if they did?
11/. Jon Stewart goes after Tucker, with delicious results.....
But first he comments on the Biden piece from last week.....
12/. Jordan Klepper goes to a Nikki Haley rally.....amusing as always even though the
Haley supporters seem a lot more sane than the Trumpies........
13/. A calm and rational column from David French on Biden's age.....
Good article....
One of the most difficult conversations you can have in life is with a parent or peer who is becoming too old and infirm to work. Whether the infirmity is physical or mental, often your loved one is the last person to realize his own deficiencies, so he may interpret respectful, genuine concern as a personal attack.
This conversation is difficult enough when it’s conducted entirely in private with friends and family. It’s infinitely more difficult when it plays out in public and involves the president of the United States.
14/. Corporations are people my friends......
15/. The Times picks the best TV and movies on Hulu.....
The Disney-owned Hulu streaming service is still, more than 15 years into its existence, thought of first as a repository for new television (and, for many cord-cutters, the “live TV” option of choice) and second as a library of indisputable TV classics, usually in their entirety. But savvy viewers can also find a rotating library of movies, both new releases and recent classics, rivaling the collections of many of its competitors — if they know where to look. We’re here to help.
Today's Pope joke....
Several centuries ago, the Pope decreed that all the Jews had to convert
to Catholicism or leave Italy.
He would have a religious debate with the leader of the Jewish community.
If the Jews won, they could stay in Italy.
If the Pope won, they would have to leave or convert.
The Jewish people met and picked an aged, but wise, Rabbi Moshe to represent them in the debate.
However, as Moshe spoke no Italian and the Pope spoke no Yiddish, they all agreed that it would be a "silent" debate.
On the chosen day, the Pope and Rabbi Moshe sat opposite each other.
The Pope raised his hand and showed three fingers.
Rabbi Moshe looked back and raised one finger.
Next ... the Pope waved his finger around his head.
Rabbi Moshe pointed to the ground where he sat.
The Pope then brought out a communion wafer and a chalice of wine. Rabbi Moshe pulled out an apple.
With that, the Pope stood up and declared that he was beaten ... that Rabbi
Moshe was too clever and that the Jews could stay in Italy.
Later, the Cardinals met with the Pope, asking what had happened.
The Pope said, "First, I held up three fingers to represent the Trinity.
He responded by holding up one finger to remind me that there is still only one God common to both our beliefs.
Then, I waved my finger around my head to show him that God was all around us.
He responded by pointing to the ground to show that God was also right here with us.
I pulled out the wine and wafer to show that God absolves us of all our sins.
He pulled out an apple to remind me of the original sin.
He had me beaten at my every move and I could not continue.
"Meanwhile ... the Jewish community was gathered around Rabbi Moshe.
"How did you win the debate?" they asked. "I haven't a clue," said Moshe.
"First he said to me that we had three days to get out of Italy , so I gave him the finger!
Then he tells me that the whole country would be cleared of Jews.
And I said to him we're staying right here." "And then what?" asked a woman
“Who knows? " said Moshe, "He took out his lunch so I took out mine."
Today's Mensa jokes
The Washington Post's Mensa Invitational once again invited readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition.
Here are the winners:
1. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period of time.
2. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an asshole.
3. Intaxicaton: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.
4. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.
5. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.
6. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid
7. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.
8. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.
9. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.
10. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease.
11. Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.
12. Decafalon (n): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you.
13. Glibido: All talk and no action.
14. Dopeler Effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.
15. Arachnoleptic Fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.
16. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and
cannot be cast out.
17. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit you're eating.
The Washington Post has also published the winning submissions to its yearly contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternate meanings for common words.
And the winners are:
1. Coffee, n. The person upon whom one coughs.
2. Flabbergasted, adj. Appalled by discovering
how much weight one has gained.
3. Abdicate, v. To give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.
4. Esplanade, v. To attempt an explanation while drunk.
5. Willy-nilly, adj. Impotent.
6. Negligent, adj. Absent mindedly answering the door when wearing only a nightgown.
7. Lymph, v. To walk with a lisp.
8. Gargoyle, n. Olive-flavored mouthwash.
9. Flatulence, n. Emergency vehicle that picks up someone who has been run over by a steamroller.
10. Balderdash, n. A rapidly receding hairline.
11. Testicle, n. A humorous question on an exam.
12. Rectitude, n. The formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.
13. Pokemon, n. A Rastafarian proctologist.
14. Oyster, n. A person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms.
15. Frisbeetarianism, n. The belief that, after death, the soul flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there.
16. Circumvent, n. An opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men.
Today's Wild West joke
A tough old cowboy from Montana counseled his granddaughter that if she wanted to live a long life, the secret was to sprinkle a
pinch of gun powder on her oatmeal every morning.
The granddaughter did this religiously until the age of 103, when she died.
She left behind 14 children, 30 grandchildren, 45 great-grandchildren, 25 great-great-grandchildren, and
a 40-foot hole where the crematorium used to be.
Today's Condo joke
Bernie comes home from breakfast at the Waffle House and pulls into a parking spot at his new condo in Boca.
As he’s walking up the path, a lovely woman leans over her window sill on the third floor and calls down to him,
“Hi! You must be new here! I’d love to meet you! Third floor, 3D, come up and see me sometime, in fact now is perfect!”, she adds with a wink.
“Sure!”, Bernie calls back, coming right up!
Wow! Bernie thinks! Nine holes with the guys, then a great breakfast, now this! It’s gonna be a great day, Bernie, ya lucky Jew!
He takes the elevator up, and knocks on 3D.
Not only is she stunning for a senior, but she’s in a gorgeous black negligee!
“Hello!”, she says in a sultry voice, “I’m Sylvia Steinberg, and you?”
“Bernie Rosenfeld, late from Brooklyn, it’s a pleasure!”
Sylvia says, “I’m not the kind of woman who beats around the Bush, Bernie, would you mind if I hold your testicles?”
Bernie is floored! “Sure..sure…”, he stammers as he drops his pants and tighty whities!
Sylvia slinks over, grabs one of his jewels in each hand.
Snarling, she begins to bang them together as hard as she can, yelling, “Dont. You. Ever. Park. In. My. Space. Again!”
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