Wednesday, April 10, 2024

Davids Daily Dose - Wednesday April 10th

 1/. No surprise here - Trump Media was bailed out by a Russian oligarch, which may be why 

the Truth Social stock is collapsing.....

Donald Trump’s social media company Trump Media managed to go public last week only after it had been kept afloat in 2022 by emergency loans provided in part by a Russian-American businessman under scrutiny in a federal insider-trading and money-laundering investigation.

The former US president stands to gain billions of dollars – his stake is currently valued at about $4bn – from the merger between Trump Media and Technology Group and the blank-check company Digital World Acquisition Corporation, which took the parent company of Truth Social public.

But Trump Media almost did not make it to the merger after regulators opened a securities investigation into the merger in 2021 and caused the company to burn through cash at an extraordinary rate as it waited to get the green light for its stock market debu

https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2024/apr/03/trump-media-es-family-trust-2022-loans




2/. An incredibly good Jon Stewart......zingers galore, very funny and nails America's response to the atrocities in Gaza.
A must watch....



3/. Tom Tomorrow nails it - our spineless media.....



4/. Andrew Sullivan with a POV on the occupation of Gaza.....there are no good guys here.....

The atrocities of October 7 — like the 9/11 mass murder of Americans — were cunningly designed to provoke an over-reaction. That’s how asymmetric warfare works. The Al-Aqsa Flood consciously mimicked Nazi tactics to inflict a psychic wound on Israelis as traumatic as any since the Shoah. The goal? To prompt an over-the-top response that could then be leveraged into further international pressure on Israel. 

The key condition of the success of this strategy, of course, was Hamas’ despicable willingness to sacrifice tens of thousands of Palestinian women and children to undo the incipient Saudi-Israeli rapprochement and to provoke one more mass-casualty event which future Palestinians would be willing to avenge.

And so far … it’s worked out just as Hamas intended, hasn’t it?                                                                                                                                                                                          https://andrewsullivan.substack.com/p/bomb-first-ask-questions-later?utm_source=post-email-title&publication_id=61371&post_id=143182117&utm_campaign=email-post-title&isFreemail=false&r=2cwgv&triedRedirect=true&utm_medium=email




5/. Victimless Crime a la Trump.....






6/. A Floridian writes a defense of our new Florida, saying our politicians are no who we are.....interesting.....
It wasn’t always like this. Even in the infamous 2000 Bush-Gore Electiondebacle, Florida wasn’t the political maelstrom it is now. We were just seen as a warm, low-cost state that you could retire to or use as an escape from the harsh winters.

Between 2000 and today, our job market exploded, with thousands of jobs and paths of upward mobility made available to all walks of life. My spouse came here under that premise, with a job offer at a local university.

Yet over the past year, it has felt like every month was the harbinger of some new insane headline. Just two weeks ago, DeSantis was threatening to fly Haitian migrants to Martha’s Vineyard.



7/. If you appreciate strangeness, you will like this SNL piece "Retirement Party".....



8/.  Thom Hartmann with a look at a new book "White Rural Rage"....very insightful....
One thing to mention - talk radio.....a lot of rural jobs are outdoors, and they always have the 
radio on, and there is nothing to listen to but right wing loonies....and the lunacy sinks in!

Rural white voters have, in many cases, far more political power than suburban or urban voters, and they’re using that outsized power to push our nation toward disaster. While they’re only 20 percent of the country, for example, because of gerrymandering they control fully 42 percent of seats in the House of Representatives.

The authors of new book, White Rural Rage: The Threat to American Democracypoint out that rural whites are measurably more bigoted and xenophobic than suburban or urban voters, 13 points more likely to hate on queer people, 15 points more likely to support Trump’s Muslim ban. 

https://hartmannreport.com/p/white-rural-rage-the-secret-political-3e8?utm_source=post-email-title&publication_id=302288&post_id=143368260&utm_campaign=email-post-title&isFreemail=true&r=2cwgv&triedRedirect=true&utm_medium=email



9/. Weekend Update
Weekend Update #1 with the lads - only fairly good.....

Weekend Update #2 - the second one with the lads.....a little better....

Weekend Update #3 - Earthquake and the Eclipse fight it out.....quite amusing....

Weekend Update #4 - Aunt Linda {one of Kristen Wiig's characters] gives her movie reviews.....I found it amusing.....



10/. There's a new category of obscene wealth - centabillionaires.....
      

There is a tiny new elite at the frontier of money-making and they are known as the centibillionaires. These titans of the universe have personal assets of at least $100bn, and there are now 14 of them in the world – up from six last year. You will find them listed, compared and celebrated by the Bloomberg billionaires index and the Forbes world’s billionaires list, which has just been published.

Thanks to these annual tallies of the superwealthy, we know that 2,781 people worldwide – 141 more than last year – have personal wealth of $1bn or more. And that Taylor Swift is now one of them. And that their collective wealth – about $14.2tn – is more than the GDP of any country except the US and China. But centibillionaires are this group’s porous top tier, described by Forbes as those who have “done much better than the average billionaire”, and their wealth is unimaginable to most of us.



11/. Here we are after billions of years of evolution....



12/. Bob lefsetz with one of his streams of consciousness rants......a lot of truth in this one.....
Title is "Vicious Society"...

You’ve got what I want and if I can’t have it too, I’m going to tear you down to the level I’m at. I’m entitled. You’re no better than me.

Or maybe you are. I see you on Instagram. God, I wasn’t born that beautiful. Forget what’s behind the facade, it’s amazing what makeup and Photoshop can do. I’m angry and depressed I lost the genetic lottery and someone has to pay for that.

As for your fabulous lifestyle… I’m at home on Saturday night with my fingers in my pants streaming “Friends.” No one invites me to a party where everybody wears white in the Hamptons. I live in America, where’s my opportunity?

Down the drain. Income inequality keeps growing and the myth keeps spreading that we can have it all, when in truth nobody can have it all. Hell, even Elon Musk complains.

But we didn’t used to be exposed to it all. Now we can see it, at our fingertips, it’s just a click away. How do we get there?

https://lefsetz.com/wordpress/2024/03/31/vicious-society/



13/. Don't overthink this stuff......


14/. Exercise is sooooooo important.....and helps your brain!

Growing up in the Netherlands, Henriette van Praag had always been active, playing sports and riding her bike to school every day. Then, in the late-1990s, while working as a staff scientist at the Salk Institute for Biological Studies in San Diego, she discovered that exercise can spur the growth of new brain cells in mature mice. After that, her approach to exercise changed.

“I started to take it more seriously,” said Dr. van Praag, now an associate professor of biomedical science at Florida Atlantic University. Today, that involves doing CrossFit and running five or six miles several days a week.

Whether exercise can cause new neurons to grow in adult humans — a feat previously thought impossible, and a tantalizing prospect to treat neurodegenerative diseases — is still up for debate. But even if it’s not possible, physical activity is excellent  for your brain, improving mood and cognition through “a plethora” of cellular changes, Dr. van Praag said.

https://www.nytimes.com/2024/04/02/well/mind/exercise-mental-health-cognition.html?smid=nytcore-ios-share&referringSource=articleShare



15/. The Guardian really likes Ripley - a new series on Netflix.....

The reviews for Netflix’s elegant new Patricia Highsmith adaptation, Ripley, have been mixed. While some critics have adored its moody black-and-white posturing and even labelled it a work of art, others have been less impressed. Is Andrew Scott a bit too old to be Tom Ripley, who is 25 in the first novel of the series? Does it compare unfavourably with the peerless Anthony Minghella version from 1999, or to 1960’s Plein Soleil, in which Alain Delon played the scheming sociopath? At eight episodes, with some pushing over the hour mark, is it stretching a relatively short novel beyond its limits?

These are all questions of taste, of course, but it is hard to deny that Ripley is slow. It takes its time, it builds its case, and it luxuriates in the beauty and/or grubbiness of its surroundings. There are lingering shots of staircases – so many staircases – and statues, skies and scenery. This is a highly aestheticised world, and the noir-ish palette works surprisingly well, considering that much of its early action is set on the Amalfi Coast. You might think that such sun-kissed luxury would disappear in monochrome, but it only makes it all the more eerie, and the sinister threat all the more pronounced.



Today's "Florida's not that bad" joke...
Senior Living In Florida
A Few years ago, my wife and I moved into a retirement development on Florida's southeast coast. 
We are living in the "Delray/Boca/Boynton Golf, Spa, Bath and Tennis Club on Lake Fake-a-Hachee". There are 3,000 lakes in Florida; only three are real. 
Our biggest retirement concern was time management. What were we going to do all day? 
Let me assure you, passing the time is not a problem. Our days are eaten up by simple, daily activities. 
Just getting out of our car takes 15 minutes. Trying to find where we parked takes 20 minutes. 
It takes a half-hour in the check-out line in Wal-Mart, and 1 hour to return the item the next day.
Let me take you through a typical day: We get up at 5:00 am, have a quick breakfast and join the early morning Walk-and-Fart Club. 
There are about 30 of us, and rain or shine, we walk around the streets, all talking at once. 
 Every development has some late risers who stay in bed until 6:00 am. 
 After a nimble walk, avoiding irate drivers out to make us road kill, we go back home, shower and change for the next activity.
My wife goes directly to the pool for her underwater Pilates class, followed by gasping for breath and CPR. 
 I put on my 'Ask me about my Grandchildren' T-shirt, my plaid mid-calf shorts, my black socks and sandals and go to the clubhouse lobby for a nice nap.
Before we know it, it's time for lunch. We go to Costco to partake of the many tasty samples dispensed by ladies in white hair nets. All free! 
After a filling lunch, if we don't have any doctor appointments, we might go to the flea market to see if any new white belts have come in or to buy a Rolex watch for $2.00.
We're usually back home by 2:00 pm to get ready for dinner. People start lining up for the early bird about 3:00 pm, but we get there by 3:45because we're late eaters. 
The dinners are very popular because of the large portions they serve. 
We can take home enough food for the next day's lunch and dinner, including extra bread, crackers, packets of mustard, relish, ketchup and Splenda, along with mints.
At 5:30 pm we're home, ready to watch the 6 o'clock news. 
By 6:30 pm we're fast asleep. Then we get up and make five or six trips to the bathroom during the night, and it's time to get up and start a new day all over again.
Doctor-related activities eat up most of our retirement time. 
I enjoy reading old magazines in sub-zero temperatures in the waiting room, so I don't mind. 
 Calling for test results also helps the days fly by. It takes at least a half-hour just getting through the doctor's phone menu. 
Then there's the hold time until we're connected to the right party. Sometimes they forget we're holding, and the whole office goes off to lunch.
Should we find we still have time on our hands, volunteering provides a rewarding opportunity to help the less fortunate. 
Florida has the largest concentration of seniors under five feet and they need our help. 
 I myself am a volunteer for 'The Vertically Challenged Over 80.' I coach their basketball team, The Arthritic Avengers. 
The hoop is only 4-1/2 feet from the floor. You should see the look of confidence on their faces when they make a slam dunk.
Food shopping is a problem for short seniors, or 'bottom feeders' as we call them, because they can't reach the items on the upper shelves. 
There are many foods they've never tasted. After shopping, most seniors can't remember where they parked their cars and wander the parking lot for hours while their food defrosts.
Lastly, it's important to choose a development with an impressive name. Italian names are very popular in Florida. 
They convey world travelers, uppity sophistication and wealth. Where would you rather live: Murray's Condos or the Lakes of Venice? 
There's no difference -- they're both owned by Murray, who happens to be a cheap bastard.
I hope this material has been of help to you future retirees. If I can be of any further assistance, please look me up when you're in Florida. 
I live in the Leaning Condos of Pisa in Boynton Beach. .



The classic Texas Chili joke
For those of you who have lived in Texas , you know how true this is. 
They actually have a Chili Cook-off about the time Halloween comes around. It takes up a major portion of a parking lot at the San Antonio City Park .
Judge #3 was an inexperienced chili taster Frank, who was visiting from Springfield , IL .
Frank: "Recently, I was honored to be selected as a judge at a chili cook-off. 
The original person called in sick at the last moment and I happened to be standing there at the judge's table, asking for directions to the Coors Light truck, when the call came in. I was assured by the other two judges (Native Texans) that the chili wouldn't be all that spicy; and, besides, they told me I could have free beer during the tasting, so I accepted and became Judge 3."
Here are the scorecard notes from the event:

CHILI # 1 - MIKE'S MANIAC MONSTER CHILI
Judge # 1 -- A little too heavy on the tomato. Amusing kick.
Judge # 2 -- Nice, smooth tomato flavor. Very mild.
Judge # 3 (Frank) -- Holy crap, what the heck is this stuff? You could remove dried paint from your driveway. 
Took me two beers to put the flames out. I hope that's the worst one. These Texans are crazy.

CHILI # 2 - AUSTIN 'S AFTERBURNER CHILI
Judge # 1 -- Smoky, with a hint of pork. Slight jalapeno tang.
Judge # 2 -- Exciting BBQ flavor, needs more peppers to be taken seriously.
Judge # 3 -- Keep this out of the reach of children. I'm not sure what I'm supposed to taste besides pain. 
I had to wave off two people who wanted to give me the Heimlich maneuver. They had to rush in more beer when they saw the look on my face.

CHILI # 3 - FRED'S FAMOUS BURN DOWN THE BARN CHILI
Judge # 1 -- Excellent firehouse chili. Great kick.
Judge # 2 -- A bit salty, good use of peppers.
Judge # 3 -- Call the EPA. I've located a uranium spill. My nose feels like I have been snorting Drano. 
Everyone knows the routine by now. Get me more beer before I ignite. 
Barmaid pounded me on the back, now my backbone is in the front part of my chest. I'm getting smashed from all of the beer.

CHILI # 4 - BUBBA'S BLACK MAGIC
Judge # 1 -- Black bean chili with almost no spice. Disappointing.
Judge # 2 -- Hint of lime in the black beans. Good side dish for fish or other mild foods, not much of a chili.
Judge # 3 -- I felt something scraping across my tongue, but was unable to taste it. Is it possible to burn out taste buds? 
Sally, the beer maid, was standing behind me with fresh refills. This 300 lb. woman is starting to look HOT ... just like this nuclear waste I'm eating! Is chili an aphrodisiac!

CHILI # 5 - LISA'S LEGAL LIP REMOVER
Judge # 1 -- Meaty, strong chili. Cayenne peppers freshly ground, adding considerable kick. Very impressive.
Judge # 2 -- Chili using shredded beef, could use more tomato. Must admit the cayenne peppers make a strong statement.
Judge # 3 -- My ears are ringing, sweat is pouring off my forehead and I can no longer focus my eyes. 
I farted, and four people behind me needed paramedics. The contestant seemed offended when I told her that her chili had given me brain damage. 
Sally saved my tongue from bleeding by pouring beer directly on it from the pitcher. 
I wonder if I'm burning my lips off. It really ticks me off that the other judges asked me to stop screaming.

CHILI # 6 - VERA'S VERY VEGETARIAN VARIETY
Judge # 1 -- Thin yet bold vegetarian variety chili. Good balance of spices and peppers.
Judge # 2 -- The best yet. Aggressive use of peppers, onions, garlic. Superb.
Judge # 3 -- My intestines are now a straight pipe filled with gaseous, sulfuric flames. 
No one seems inclined to stand behind me except that Sally. Can't feel my lips anymore. I feel like I need to wipe my butt with a snow cone.

CHILI # 7 -- SUSAN'S SCREAMING SENSATION CHILI
Judge # 1 -- A mediocre chili with too much reliance on canned peppers.
Judge # 2 -- Ho hum, tastes as if the chef literally threw in a can of chili peppers at the last moment. 
**I should take note that I am worried about Judge #3. He appears to be a bit distressed as he is cursing uncontrollably.
Judge # 3 -- You could put a grenade in my mouth, pull the pin, and I wouldn't feel a thing. I've lost sight in one eye, and the world sounds like it is made of rushing water. 
My shirt is covered with chili, which slid unnoticed out of my mouth. My pants are full of lava to match my shirt. 
At least during the autopsy, they'll know what killed me. I've decided to stop breathing, it's too painful. 
Who cares; I'm not getting any oxygen anyway. If I need air, I'll just suck it in through the 4-inch hole in my stomach.

CHILI # 8 - BIG TOM'S TOENAIL CURLING CHILI
Judge # 1 -- The perfect ending, this is a nice blend chili. Not too bold but spicy enough to declare its existence.
Judge # 2 -- This final entry is a good, balanced chili. Neither mild nor hot. Sorry to see that most of it was lost when Judge #3 farted, passed out, fell over and pulled the chili pot down on top of himself. Not sure if he's going to make it. Poor feller, wonder how he'd have reacted to really hot chili..
Judge # 3 - No report



Today's jokes for seniors...
01. The ability to speak several languages is an asset, but the ability to keep your mouth shut in any language is priceless!
02. Be decisive. Right or wrong, make a decision. The road is paved with flat squirrels who couldn’t make a decision. 
03. When I get a headache, I take two aspirin and keep away from children just like the bottle says. 
04. Just once, I want the prompt for username and password to say, “Close enough.”
05.  Becoming an adult is the dumbest thing I’ve ever done.
06. If you see me talking to myself, just move along. I’m self-employed. We’re having a meeting.
07. Does anyone else have a plastic bag full of plastic bags or is it just me.
08. I hate it when I can’t figure out how to operate the iPad and my tech support guy is asleep. He’s 5 and it’s past his bedtime
09. Today’s 3-year-olds can switch on laptops and open their favorite apps. When I was 3, I ate mud.
10. Tip for a successful marriage: Don’t ask your wife when dinner will be ready while she’s mowing the lawn.
11. So, you drive across town to a gym to walk on a treadmill?
12. Old age is coming at a really bad time.
13. If God wanted me to touch my toes, He would've put them on my knees.
14. Last year I joined a support group for procrastinators. We haven't met yet.
15. Why do I have to press one for English when you're just going to transfer me to someone I can't understand anyway?
16. I don't need anger management. I need people to stop irritating me.
17. My people skills are just fine. It's my tolerance for idiots that needs work.
18. "On time" is, when I get there.
19. Even duct tape can't fix stupid – but it sure does muffle the sound.
20. It would be wonderful if we could put ourselves in the dryer for ten minutes, then come out wrinkle-free...and three sizes smaller.
21. "One for the road" means peeing before you leave the house!


Thursday, April 4, 2024

Davids Daily Dose - Thursday April 4th

 

1/. Two excellent essays by Andrew Sullivan.....
The first is on how Christianism has morphed into the political movement it is today.....really interesting.....
The second is on Joe Lieberman's toxic legacy.....





2/. Tom Tomorrow on Joe Lieberman.....and it's all true.....



3/. It looks like the Supreme Court will throw out the attempt to ban mifepristone, the abortion 
pill, but only temporarily.....wait for a Republican president!

I
t is a testament to how weak the plaintiffs’ case is that the justices seemed so skeptical. Erin Hawley, a lawyer for the far-right antifeminist litigation shop Alliance Defending Freedom and the spouse of the conservative US senator Josh Hawley, usually gets a much warmer reception at One First Street. But in Tuesday’s oral arguments in Alliance for Hippocratic Medicine v FDA – a lawsuit which seeks to challenge FDA approval of the abortion drug mifepristone, and specifically to reverse regulatory changes that made the drug more easily accessible – she was on the defensive.



4/. The SNL cold open for Easter......quite good, it features the orange "Jesus".....



5/. You may have heard Beyonce just made a Country album.....Bob Lefsetz has some thoughts on this.....

What kind of crazy, f*cked up world do we live in where Taylor Swift leaves country for Top Forty and Beyoncé leaves Top Forty for country?

One in which the story is almost always about the personality and the money but almost never about the music itself.

There’s a lot to say about Beyoncé. Her marriage, her children, her brand extensions, but except for the tenure and breakup of Destiny’s Child, deep in the rearview mirror, none of it has been salacious, or political. In a world where many have children sans marriage and divorce remains rampant, Beyoncé appears to be old-fashioned, an American role model, not that those outside the Black community give her her proper due.

But none of this is the story, the story is the music. Starting with “Texas Hold ‘Em” and now the release of the album “Cowboy Carter,” which even has a cover of a Beatles song?

https://lefsetz.com/wordpress/2024/03/30/beyonce-goes-country/




6/. Time to watch this again.....Chevron....




7/. Are you aware in three weeks you won't be able to have an abortion in Florida, with no exceptions? 
Thought not.....but there is a solution in November....

It’s hard to imagine a scenario in which the Florida state supreme court would not have allowed Governor Ron DeSantis’s six-week abortion ban to go into effect. In a challenge to a previous 15-week ban, the court’s seven judges, all of whom were appointed by DeSantis, overturned 35 years of precedent this week in order to find that the right to privacy enshrined in the state constitution does not protect the right to an abortion, as Florida state law has acknowledged it does since 1989.

The court’s approval of the 15-week ban will allow a stricter, previously stayed six-week ban to go into effect on 1 May. Justice Charles Canady did not recuse himself from the case, despite calls for him do so from no less an authority than the Florida supreme court’s former chief justice, Barbara Pariente. Justice Canady’s wife, the state representative Jennifer Canady, is a legislative co-sponsor of the newly approved six-week ban. There is no rape or incest exception.



8/. NBC really shot themselves in the foot by hiring [then firing] Ronna McDaniel..



9/. All Weekend Updates....
Weekend Update #1 with the lads- a decent one....

Weekend Update #2 - Chloe Fineman is a TikTok influencer .....amusing......

Weekend Update #3 - I love Sarah Sherman, here she is as Flaco's widow....very amusing....




10/. Medical professionals are warning about Trump's dementia, butt the mainstream media are 
ignoring and "both-sidesing" his impairments.....this is dangerous!

Donald Trump’s obvious public challenges with speech, language, and thinking are continuing to get worse. At a recent rally in Ohio, the former president continued to act like a broken computer, going off on odd tangents, rambling, muddling his speech, and saying, “Joe Biden won against Barack Hussein Obama, has anyone ever heard of him? Every swing state, Biden beat Obama but in every other state, he got killed.”



11/. I wish this was funny.....




12/. Poland just pushed out an authoritarian government......here's what happened from the Guardian...

My formative journalistic years were spent reporting on the final freeze of the cold war – days of hard times and soft currencies. When I return to those countries now, I test myself on how well I guessed what would follow in the three decades since. On Poland in particular, I would have been hard pressed to predict the giddy zigzag of power still featuring a generation who marched to topple communism, but whose protagonists feud bitterly about how to govern the country in the 21st century.

We talk a lot about places that have recently bought a one-way ticket towards authoritarian politics – Russia and Turkey for the full-fat versions, and Hungary’s democratic backsliding and stifling of independent institutions.

I had pondered about what happens when a country that embraced populist nationalism does a 180-degree turn and seeks to restore legal and democratic norms at top speed. What happens to laws passed under the previous masters of the house: the courts, state media, and business and other institutions stuffed by supporters of one side?




13/. Desi Lydic "Foxplains" Trump's financial penalties.....amusing, but this is what stupids see on Fox News!



14/. Sonya Sotomayor is the next RBG.....a liberal Justice who refuses to resign.....

Forget Ruth Bader Ginsburg. It is Sonia Sotomayor who is the greatest liberal to sit on the supreme court in my adult lifetime. The first Latina to hold the position of justice, she has blazed a relentlessly progressive trail on the highest bench in the land.
Whether it was her lone dissent in a North Carolina voting rights case in 2016 (“the court’s conclusion … is a fiction”); her ingenious referencing of Ta-Nehisi Coates, James Baldwin and WEB DuBois in another 2016 dissent over unreasonable searches and seizures; or her withering observation at the Dobbs oral argument in 2021 (“Will this institution survive the stench that this creates in the public perception that the constitution and its reading are just political acts?”), Sotomayor has stood head and shoulders above both her liberal and conservative colleagues on the bench for the past 15 years. 



15/. Everything scientists know [and also disagree on] about 'Black Holes".....a story for us sci-fi nerds......

Black holes are, of course, awesome. But, for scientists, they are more awesome. If a rainbow is marvellous, then understanding how all the colors of the rainbow are present, unified, in ordinary white light—that’s more marvellous. (Though, famously, in his poem “Lamia,” John Keats disagreed, blaming “cold philosophy” for unweaving the rainbow.) In recent years, the amount of data that scientists have discovered about black holes has grown exponentially. In January, astronomers announced that the James Webb Space Telescope had observed the oldest black hole yet—one present when the universe was a mere four hundred million years old. (It’s estimated that it’s now 13.8 billion years old.) Recently, two supermassive black holes, with a combined mass of twenty-eight billion suns, were measured and shown to have been rotating tightly around each other, but not colliding, for the past three billion years. 



16/. Looks like a few really good movies in this fairly short list....
The best movies of 2024 so far....





17/. Ewan Mcgregor in "A Gentleman In Moscow".....

A Gentleman in Moscow review – Ewan McGregor is almost as fantastic as his outrageous moustache

This charming period drama about a 1920s Russian aristocrat being kept in a hotel by the Bolsheviks sees McGregor on sparkling form. He’s an intoxicating, swaggering figure of delight



18/. The Times lists 12 movies to watch before Netflix deletes them in April.....on it!



19/. Just what we need in this run up to the election -six decent comedy specials.....

6 Terrific Specials From 6 Very Different Comics, Streaming Now

Jenny Slate, Dan Soder, Cara Connors, Tig Notaro, David Cross and Dave Attell stamp these hours with particularly rich sensibilities.





Today's Steven Wright jokes....
The Quotes of Steven Wright:
1 - I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.
2 - Borrow money from pessimists -- they don't expect it back.
3 - Half the people you know are below average.
4 - 99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
5 - 82.7% of all statistics are made up on the spot.
6 - A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.
7 - A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
8 - If you want the rainbow, you have to put up with the rain.
9 - All those who believe in psychokinesis, raise my hand.
10 - The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
11 - I almost had a psychic girlfriend, ..... But she left me before we met.
12 - OK, so what's the speed of dark?
13 - How do you tell when you're out of invisible ink?
14 - If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
15 - Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
16 - When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
17 - Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.
18 - Hard work pays off in the future; laziness pays off now.
19 - I intend to live forever ... So far, so good.
20 - If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
21 - Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
22 - What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
23 - My mechanic told me, "I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder."
24 - Why do psychics have to ask you for your name
25 - If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
26 - A conclusion is the place where you get tired of thinking.
27 - Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
28 - The hardness of the butter is proportional to the softness of the bread.
29 - To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.
30 - The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.
31 - The sooner you fall behind, the more time you'll have to catch up.
32 - The colder the x-ray table, the more of your body is required to be on it.
33 - Everyone has a photographic memory; some just don't have film.
34 - If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
35 - If your car could travel at the speed of light, would your headlights work?



Today's Orthodox Jewish joke...
A modern, Orthodo Jewish couple, preparing for a religious wedding, meets with their rabbi for counseling.
The rabbi asks if they have any last questions before they leave.
The man asks, "Rabbi, we realize it's tradition for men to dance with men, and women to dance with women at the reception. 
But, we'd like your permission to dance together."
"Absolutely not," says the rabbi. "It's immodest. Men and women always dance separately."
''So after the ceremony I can't even dance with my own wife?"
"No," answered the rabbi. "It's forbidden."
"Well, okay," says the man, "what about sex? Can we finally have sex?"
"Of course!" replies the rabbi. "Sex is a mitzvah (good thing) within marriage, to have children!"
"What about different positions?" asks the man.
"No problem," says the rabbi. "It's a mitzvah!"
"Woman on top?" the man asks.
"Sure," says the rabbi. "Go for it! It's a mitzvah!"
"Doggy style?"
"Sure! Another mitzvah!"
"On the kitchen table?"
"Yes, yes! A mitzvah!"
"Can we do it on rubber sheets with a bottle of hot oil, a couple of vibrators, a leather harness, a bucket of honey and a porno video?"
"You may indeed. It's all a mitzvah!"
"Can we do it standing up?"
"No." says the rabbi."
"Why not?" asks the man.
"It could lead to dancing!"


Today's Doctor joke....
I was due for an appointment with the gynecologist later in the week. 
Early one morning, I received a call from the doctor’s office to tell me that I had been rescheduled for that morning at 9:30 am. 
I had only just packed everyone off to work and school, and it was already around 8:45am. 
The trip to his office took about 35 minutes, so I didn't have any time to spare. 
As most women do, I like to take a little extra effort over hygiene when making such visits, but this time I wasn’t going to be able to make the full effort.
So, I rushed upstairs, threw off my pajamas, wet the washcloth that was sitting next to the sink, and gave myself a quick wash in that area to make sure I was at least presentable.
 I threw the washcloth in the clothes basket, donned some clothes, hopped in the car and raced to my appointment.
I was in the waiting room for only a few minutes when I was called in. 
Knowing the procedure, as I’m sure you do, I hopped up on the table, looked over at the other side of the room and pretended that I was in Paris or some other place a million miles away.
I was a little surprised when the doctor said, “My, we have made an extra effort this morning, haven’t we?” I didn’t respond.
After the appointment, I heaved a sigh of relief and went home. 
The rest of the day was normal .. Some shopping, cleaning, cooking. 
After school when my 6 year old daughter was playing, she called out from the bathroom, “Mommy, where’s my washcloth?”
I told her to get another one from the cupboard.
She replied, “No, I need the one that was here by the sink, it had all my glitter and sparkles saved inside it.”
Never going back to that doctor again……….. never.



Today's clever insults....
1. "I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; 
Bring a friend, if you have one."
George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill. 
"Cannot possibly attend first night, I will attend the second...If there is one."
- Winston Churchill, in response. 
2. A member of Parliament to Disraeli: "Sir, you will either die on the gallows, or of some unspeakable disease."
· "That depends, Sir," said Disraeli, "whether I embrace your policies or your mistress." 
3. "He had delusions of adequacy." - Walter Kerr 
4. "I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure."
- Clarence Darrow
5. "He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary."
- William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway). 
6."Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I'll waste no time reading it."
- Moses Hadas
7. "I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it."
- Mark Twain
8. "He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.."
- Oscar Wilde 
9. "I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here."
- Stephen Bishop
10."He is a self-made man and worships his creator."
- John Bright
11. "I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial."
- Irvin S. Cobb 
12. "He is not only dull himself; he is the cause of dullness in others."
- Samuel Johnson 
13. "He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up."
- Paul Keating
14. "In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily."
- Charles, Count Talleyrand
15. "He loves nature in spite of what it did to him."
- Forrest Tucker 
16. "Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?"
- Mark Twain 
17. "His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork."
- Mae West
18. "Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go."
- Oscar Wilde
19. "He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... For support rather than illumination."
- Andrew Lang (1844-1912)
20. "He has Van Gogh's ear for music."
- Billy Wilder
21. "I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it."
- Groucho Marx.
22."He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire."
- Winston Churchill